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IDENTIFY AND DON'T COMPARE

Many times over the years in meetings, I have heard people make the statement "identify and don't compare."  In the very beginning of my recovery, I thought it referred to substances that we were addicted to -- like heroin, cocaine, marijuana, booze,etc.  At that time, my alcoholic mind was focused solely on the substance as being responsible for my maladies, not me.

As time progressed, I began to find other meanings for identification versus comparison.  As I have matured in sobriety, I have come to see the dangers of comparison.

It is easy to find others more fortunate than myself, if I measure things only by outward appearances and fail to look inside.  For me, it is much harder to look at all the wonderful things I have and consider myself the more fortunate one (when in the midst of comparison).

When I commence to devaluing my life through one of these self-pity motivated comparison sessions, I place myself in danger of picking up that next drink.  The motivating factor for my sobriety is the fact that I love my life and don't want to screw it up with booze or other drugs; however, if I convince myself that my life isn't all that great, I place myself at risk for a "what the hell" attitude and eventually "why not?"  Been there.  Done that.

On page 77 of the big book, it states that our real purpose is to fit ourselves to be of maximum service to God.  It seems that whenever I deviate from this, I start to compare and things go down hill rapidly.  Keeping this goal in mind, it is hard to worry about one's salary level, where they live, their education or who's sleeping with who.  Essentially, it is a reminder that we have a primary purpose, and just as a group can falter if it ignores that, so can I as an individual.

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